"Repo Man"(1984)d/Alex Cox

 1984 was a pretty eventful year, looking back.Ethiopean famine, Bernie Goetz' vigilante subway shootings, James Huberty's shooting spree at a San Ysidro McDonalds, British comedian Tommy Cooper had a heart attack and died in the middle of a skit on live television, Michael Jackson burned his hair off while filming a Pepsi commercial, The "Nightstalker" murders, Vanessa Williams' Miss America/Penthouse scandal, Indira Gandhi's assassination, I.R.A. bombings in Brighton, Botha takes presidential office in South Africa...but most importantly, it was the year that filmmaker Alex Cox unveiled his film, Repo Man, a suburban punk/sci-fi/cold war comedy produced, in part, by former Monkee Mike Nesmith, and starring Martin Sheen's other son, Emilio Estevez and Harry Dean Stanton, on the unsuspecting planet.Another aspect of the cult classic nobody was ready for, was the amazing soundtrack, provided by punk icons Iggy Pop, Black Flag, Circle Jerks, FEAR, Suicidal Tendencies, and The Plugz.If you've seen it, and it isn't one of your favorite movies of the eighties, well, there's no real diplomatic way around telling you that I hope yours was one of the houses the boys and I regularly targeted for mindless vandalism during the era, and if it wasn't, it definitely should have been, you fucking drag, you.Now let's start a war...
 
 "Maybe I will stack the peaches into a can-pyramid, Otto(Emilio Estevez).GOSH."
Otto(Emilio Estevez) is a disillusioned white suburban punk who's tired of endlessly stocking shelves with generic product at the supermarket and his anarchically cramped lifestyle where fetching a beer for his mohawked girlfriend, Debbie(Jennifer Balgobin)  means losing his spot in bed to Duke(Cox's pal, the aptly-named Dick Rude) during a wild debacle.His life of circle pits in the alleyway, work boots, and dangling earrings changes drastically when he meets Bud(Harry Dean Stanton), a shabby-looking middle aged speed freak who tricks him into helping repossess a car, a profession he despises until he gets slipped a pile of Helping Hand Acceptance Corporation cash for his efforts.As an added bonus, he takes a shine to Leila(Olivia Borash), an oddball broad(who's carrying around a Polaroid of condoms in grass shirts) who's been chasing a 1964 Chevy Malibu as driven by a mad government scientist(Fox Harris) and containing four dead aliens in the trunk, that vaporizes anyone instantly into radioactive debris if they dare to peer inside.Elsewhere, Duke and Debbie inevitably turn to a life of crime; stealing cars, robbing liquor stores, and eating sushi, and not paying afterwards, the fiends.
 
 "Is that a Class of '74 gold ring?!!?AAAAAGGGGRRRRAAAAAHHH!!!"
Soon, hilarity ensues as Otto's imposing on kindly little old ladies whose grandsons are scoot mods in a third generation ska band(legendary LA outfit The Untouchables in a nice cameo) earns him some nifty trombone-born facial contusions.There are some lines of speed blown, rival low riding Hispanics, a lot worker touching upon cosmic unconsciousness, pine tree air fresheners, allusions to Burroughs, Mike Nesmith in a cameo as a rabbi, reckless driving, vaporized punk rockers, government agents with tin foil gloves, or robotic arms, if we're to overlook budgetary confines just this once, and when a twenty thousand dollar repo bounty turns up on the aforementioned antique Chevy, all hell really breaks loose.In case you've been living in your mother's basement the past few decades, only coming up for pie and live polkas on public television, and haven't had the chance to see this one yet, I'll refrain from spoiling the dramatic climax for you, as it's one you'll have to experience to believe.
 
 Sorry, honey, I can only hear you when you speak from the backseat.
Nap Dynamite-predecessor Zander Schloss ended up joining the Circle Jerks after production of the movie wrapped.I would have liked to see what Dennis Hopper could have brought to Fox Harris' role as was intended, but at the time, Hopper was apparently too busy playing Hopper, man.I can dig it.Cox followed this one up with the much-ballyhooed Sid and Nancy in 1986, which may or may not contain an excellent Gary Oldman performance, I just can't get past Chloe fucking Webb's eardrum-grating voice in the damned thing to find out.He also tackled the Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas screenplay in 1998(and whiffed, apart from the credit), and directed Repo Chick in '09, something I've yet to check out.Yeah, a few things slip under the radar from time to time, but I'm a mostly thorough em-effer, wouldn't you say?For me, 1984 was mostly long hair, frag-stache, kung fu, and chicks from other high schools, kind of lost in an awkward blur in the mad dash towards growth into adulthood, but anytime I sit down to Repo, it's all right there again like yesterday, ripped to the tits with hilarious dialogue, tunes, and visuals.Cult classic.Three Wops.
 
 Aurora's full-sized glow-in-the-dark 1964 Chevy Malibu didn't generate as much interest as originally projected...
 

"Necromancy"(1972)d/Bert I. Gordon

Here's another rarely-seen late oddity from Mr. B.I.G. himself  that turned up a decade later during the video tape era, a lethargic low budget Orson Welles occult effort reworked with added nudity and blood-letting and repackaged as 'The Witching' by the folks at Paragon, the updated trailer with repetitive takes of Orson's portly facepiece hogging the lens while clutching multiple chalices and inimitably burping corny sorcery-based dialogue remains one of my fondest memories of the time, and always pulled some laughs out of me when I saw it, regardless of how miserable I may have been, prior to.For you new boots on the block, Orson Welles ran the gamut in film, having directed and starred in R.K.O.'s Citizen Kane(1941), a movie that many consider the greatest the art form has offered to date(Not I, says I), and then, thirty years later, he's waddling around in a house-sized ceremonial robe with nude Satanites n' Satanettes flanking him(Brinke Stevens is in there, in an early cameo), toiling in a witchy B-movie for the guy responsible for drive-in gold like War of the Colossal Beast(1958), Food of the Gods(1976), and Empire of the Ants(1977).Providing petite brunette eye candy for your humble N in this one, is the waifish Pamela Franklin, an actress unafraid to break 'em out for the dark lord and master in the name of artistic integrity and plot continuity.Ahem.Also on board are Twin Peaks' Sheriff Harry S. Truman, Michael Ontkean, and fiery Lee Purcell, a redhead I'll never forget thanks to her Valley Girl(1983) cougar.Grrrrrrrr, baby, grrrrrrrrr.

This could be a snapshot from my old place back in the mid to late nineties, I tell you.
The Brandons(Pam Franklin, Michael Ontkean) look to put a painful miscarriage, caused by a group of naked Satanists ritually shanking a doll elsewhere, in the rearview mirror and take to the road, where Frank's reckless juggling of an argument and navigating a winding mountain road leaves a carload of innocents in a flaming wreck that Lori manages to snare a weird doll with fingernail clippings in its pocket from.Hmmm, if that's awful peculiar to you, then Frank's hiring in the small town of Lilith as a toymaker for the shadowy kid-denouncing Mr. Cato(Orson Welles) will seem equally right off the bat fishy to you.And with good reason, too, because her husband and the rotund employer are indeed cultmates of the old religion, with designs on harnessing Lori's yet-unknown-but-highly-groovy psychic powers of necromancy to resurrect Cato's son from the grave, after willingly becoming a witch in their sexy coven, of course.Cato mumbles...incessantly...at...great lengths... at a party...mumble...mumble.Frames repeat again and again.Meanwhile, hallucinatory premonitions warn Lori to refrain from ever using her powers or she will perish.You should probably listen to your hallucinations when they tell you you're going to die, Lor'...
 
If she had a cigarette dangling from her lip, this'd be the "Sexy" card.
It seems that the wide-waisted warlock has spent several years trying to bring his son back to life, and disallowed all Lilith residents from having children until he finally succeeds.Goat heads.Outta sight dancing naked chicks.Gobletsful of Paul Masson.Human sacrifices, he's tried it all, Satan knows he has.Now, Lori alone, holds the key to unlocking the gateway between life and death, the infernal rite only stoppable by Lori's revulsion to the black arts and witcher-huh, she's okay with it?Oh well, I guess that's cool, too.Lori's inducted into the circle of black magicians, she raises Cato's son from the dead, and gets herself buried alive in his place.Oh, those muted screams will soon be replaced by the laughter and merriment of father-son cultist sack races and barbeques and fishing trips.An ending that could only be interpreted as a 'downer' if you're a square that's got no love for Lucifer.

Orson just wants to be happy, and by 'happy' he means roughly the size of a Buick.
Gordon followed this one up with The Mad Bomber(1973), before putting a B-movie spin on H.G. Wells' Food of the Gods three years later, while Big Orson, who really doesn't bag enough screen time here to merit a starring credit if you ask me, would continue acting right up until his death in 1985, lending his unmistakable voice to things like Shogun(1980), Slapstick(of Another Kind)(1982), with Jerry Lewis and Madeline Kahn, and The Transformers:The Movie(1986). Pamela Franklin wasn't nearly finished with genre movies after this effort, appearing in Legend of Hell House(1973), telefilm Satan's School for Girls(1973), and Gordon's own Food of the Gods in '76. Lee Purcell would later turn up in Stir Crazy(1980), Airplane II:The Sequel(1982), and Homework(1982), her only genre credit since being The Unknown/Clawed:The Legend of Sasquatch in 2005.As for tonight's entry, the PG of the Necromancy cut is misleading, when you look at the amount of nudity and blood that the Witching cut brings to the table.As muddled an affair this turned out to be, it's worth a look for the curious and fans of dated cinema witchery.Two Wops.

Well that knackers the Herman's Hermits comeback tour, 'duddnit?

"The Pom Pom Girls"(1976)d/Joseph Ruben

 As summer approaches fast in the rearview mirror, we'll take a look at another seventies-tastic Crown International drive-in hit from Joseph Ruben, reminding us just how unforgettable those girls that turned us on really were, in another teen sex comedy starring a cast of familiar genre actors including Robert Carradine, Bill Adler, Cheryl "Rainbeaux" Smith, and Jennifer Ashley; centered around high school hijinks between rival football squads, and peppered with genre staples of the day like make out vans, dope-smoking, beer-chugging, littering, drive-in restaurant sex(never gets old, just wish they'd stop serving it up with ugly-looking fast food), tits n' asses, stolen fire engines, limp fistfights, games of 'Suicide Chicken', and a total disregard for all things education and authority in the country's bicentennial year, man.Probably the wrong flick to get into if you're looking for logic and cohesion, but a helluva good-often raunchy,  time capsule of reckless youth of the happening seventies.Let's get this started, now who's rollin' the hog's leg to pass around...

 Wood(would) times five.
 School is in for the senior class at Rosedale High, and for Johnnie(Robert Carradine), a loose wire that ain't afraid to take a piss out a classroom window,  with a cherry '55 Chevy and goofy overbite,  it's an opportunity to show off to Sally(Lisa Reeves), Duane(Bill Adler)'s sweet blonde arm decoration, and best his rival in the process in a series of chest-puffing feats of bravado and stupidity.Johnnie's pal, Jesse(Michael Mullins) has designs on getting this happening brunette named Laurie(Jennifer Ashley) onto the air mattress in the back of his love machine, but fellow promiscuous Pom Pommer, Roxanne(Rainbeaux Smith) and drive-in waitress Sue Ann(Susan Player) will do, if that frigid bitch won't put out.With "the big game" with rivals Hardin High approaching fast on the horizon, a prank war has commenced between the schools, and harmless mascot effigies hung burning from nooses and car vandalism soon escalate into sloppily choreographed Western saloon-level fistfights and hosing down rival players and pursuant officers of the law from a stolen fire truck Johnnie and Co. end up in(big deal, they didn't do it naked.).To these fun-loving young tearaways, quadratic equations are for squares.Did I just make a fucking mathematics joke?Where's that cyanide capsule...
 
 The one and only Rainbeaux I'd ever be interested in chasing, thankyouverymuch.
 Of course, we get to see lots of reckless driving, an obligatory gross cafeteria food fight, pop-top beer-chugging(Johnnie's shirt ends up drinking more beer than he does, if you're keeping score the way I was, the way grizzled veterans often do), beach frolicking, some amusing soul sistahs trying out for the cheer squad, Jesse slugging the cocky football coach in the mush, some spirited joint passing, Laurie obliviously failing to notice Jesse and Sue Ann backseat boogieing right in front of her classroom window, then giving him her own goodies under her sleeping parents' noses, followed by a chuckle-worthy breakfast table sequence in it's own right.The football game degenerates into a battle royale after a single play, and Duane channels Brando in challenging Johnnie to a dangerous game of suicide chicken near an oceanside cliff.Johnnie drives Duane's car off the edge, jumping out at the last possible moment to live and torture him about bagging his girl yet another day.All's well that ends well, I guess.
 
 Sheesh, he's outta position on the MLB blitz, and he's a jibber bogart.
 Though I was never much for cheerleaders growing up(they always seemed a bit too shallow and saccharine-flavored for my 'refined tastes', apart from one or two rare birds that really layed it on me), I could watch the drive-in movie variety all day long.Especially when one's Rainbeaux Smith, one of my all-time favorite chicks, at her sweet n' sensual peak here, despite being mostly overshadowed by her co-stars, the wholesome brunette, Jennifer Ashley, who you'll remember from stuff like Phantom of the Paradise(1974), Tintorera(1977), and Horror Planet, aka/Inseminoid(1981), and leggy blonde, Lisa Reeves, who you probably won't remember from You Light Up My Life(1977) and the 1977 San Pedro Beach Bums tv series.Robert Carradine has been in everything from the iconic cult classic, Massacre at Central High(1976) and Orca(1976), to Revenge of the Nerds(1985) and the Humanoids from the Deep made-for-tv remake(1996).Hell, he even played a skinhead in Carpenter's Escape from LA(1996).Adler, who we just saw in Van Nuys Blvd.(1976), also featured prominently in genre fare like The Van(1977), Blue Sunshine and Malibu Beach( both 1978).On the scale, Pom Pom scores an average two Wops for technical skill, which doesn't make itself very apparent here, though entertainment-wise, it would easily earn another, a cult classic, perfect for the impending hot weather and hot babes that go hand-in-hand with it.See it.
 

Stealing a fire engine for a joyride?Oh, you crazy high school kids.