Not that long ago, in another one of my rant-filled editorials here, I joked about holding out on the blu-ray format until a company released special remastered editions of Staten Island Shit-King, late director Andy Milligan's existing catalog of films. I was joking. Earlier this morning I was browsing eBay for some missing pieces to my own extensive, yet sensible dvd collection, when I stumbled upon the page that I took a screenshot of for you, above. My joke had come full circle. Who (but self-proclaimed shit lover Nicolas Winding Refn, probably) would pay fifty clams for a Milligan title on blu-ray? You only to see one of his ...films, to realize that that snooze fest video your grandparents had shot for their anniversary had higher production values, better camerawork, sound, editing, direction, and was vastly more coherent. The guy responsible for writing and directing Maximum Overdrive once called Milligan one of the worst filmmakers ever. And he wrote and directed Maximum Overdrive, ferchrissakes. But is this really about a company willing to waste time, money, and effort to clean up Milligan ass pies for public consumption? I don't think so. It's something else entirely...
If an Andy Milligan movie gets a 4K restoration, does that make it better or worse?
As commendable a job companies like Code Red and Arrow Video have done in releasing massive catalogs of collectible horror blu-rays, I believe they're ultimately at fault here, preying on helpless OCD horrorphiles, who are not only mostly unfamiliar with the productions they race to pre-order online, they're also unfazed by the massive amount of fail they fill their shelves with, only that they've successfully filled them with every available release by the aforementioned companies. "Look at all my Arrow releases!", they'll exclaim proudly in Facebook support groups, ignorant to the double disc special edition blu-ray of Microwave fucking Massacre that's on display in the jpeg, for the world to see. Embarrassingly rotten movie that had a cool big box release in the VHS era, if you're unfamiliar. Crying for an extensively retooled, limited edition with a restored blu-ray quality print that'll eventually only be had for fifty to a hundred bucks via eBay auction? Hardly. But these obsessive types won't mind, because their collection isn't based on quality, but in fact, owning everything one or more companies have put out. So be it, as a certain legendarily difficult German actor repeatedly said, both off and on his air duct toboggan of death in a movie familiar to many.
"Just gotta wash my hands 235 more times, then I'll order the Code Red triple feature of Bloodthirsty Butchers, Man With Two Heads, and Torture Dungeon for 150 bucks!"
As far as updates go, that's all I've got for you this time around. We'll pick right up with reviews of your favorite genre movies in a few days. Some Hammer Studios fare, new indie horror, and a few surprises along the way. Late!
Loved by Jupiter,
Wop
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