Showing posts with label Martin Landau. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Martin Landau. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

"Alone in the Dark" (1982) d/ Jack Shoulder

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The pioneer release from New Line Cinema, director Jack Shoulder's first effort, is this tidy little slasher that features no less than three mammoth genre names among its cast members, with Donald Pleasence, Jack Palance, and Martin Landau all doing their respective part in raising this one above the standard stalk n' slash fare that permeated theaters of the day, despite the familiar "psychos are loose!" vein, as heavily mined as it had already been, to that point.

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"Was that 'two Charlies, two Bunnies, and a Black and White'? Or 'a Charlie, no Bunnies, and two Black and Whites'?"
Dr. Potter (Dwight "Murdock" Schultz) lands a gig replacing Dr. Merton on the staff of  Leo Bain (Donald Pleasence), a reefer-toking, left field psychiatrist with an unorthodox approach to his patients at the Haven mental hospital, with only electrically locked third floor windows and doors keeping the most psychopathic, homicidal cases from escaping into the general populace. It's a good thing, too, with the likes of  Hawkes (Jack Palance) the paranoiac, Preacher (Martin Landau) the pyromaniac, Fatty (Erland van Lidth) the child molester, and Bleeder (Phil Clark) the sociopath in there, and all under the impression that Potter killed Merton, one of their favorites...At home, Potter's got his hands full with his wife, Nell (Deborah Hedwall), young daughter, Lyla, and sister, Toni (Lee Taylor-Allan), fresh from a mental breakdown, herself, all occupying space in his pad. Toni drags her unreceptive brother out to a local club, where a punk band's set is interrupted by a state-wide power outage. The next morning at the institution, there's a dead security guard, and four inmates missing. Hmmm, I wonder which ones...

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"...and I once saw a bee on a butterfly bush, while pounding Stegmaiers outside the Tomhicken recreational building..."
Pretty soon, Toni's meeting strange men while getting arrested at anti-nuke protests,  Lyla's learning how to make origami shapes from giant strangers, and when the teenage babysitter shows up to check on her, she and her horny beau end up getting added to the film's minimal body count. After a tense dinner, a visiting detective finds himself pinned to a tree by arrows, while the escaped lunatics have surrounded Potter's home. Dr. Bain makes the frantic scene, but his attempt at reasoning with the men leaves him one ear short, and but a bloody notch on Preacher's righteous axe in the end. After Preacher manages to set the basement ablaze and Fatty gets a back rub with a massive meat cleaver, Toni's new love interest turns out to be Bleeder, whose pesky nosebleed gives him away as he tries to strangle the young woman, eating  knife blade-inflicted death, himself, instead. Hawkes shows up in time to see Dr. Merton alive on television, storming out angrily after waxing poetic upon murder, and ending up at the punk rock club,  fitting in perfectly amid the regulars. Ba dum bump.

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"Love lifts you up where you belooooong," sings Fatty (Erland van Lidth).
Interestingly, the two singers from "The Sic Fucks", opened the first punk rock boutique in America back in 1977, called Manic Panic, located on St. Mark's Place in the East Village; also providing the boldly hued hair dye of the same name that would decorate the heads of young top heavy playthings that often found themselves on all fours in front of me, in the throes of tantric multi-O's, for decades to come. You'll remember mountainous Dutch noble, van Lidth, as "Terror", the head of the Fordham Baldies in 1979's The Wanderers. Lin Shaye has a brief cameo towards the beginning here, and her older brother, Robert, who snagged a co-producer credit, also provided the story behind tonight's review. Also worth noting,  the era's Gore God, Tom Savini himself, serves up a practical FX nightmare along the way. On the scale, Alone earns two Wops, a highly watchable slasher in a genre already ripe with brainless carbon copies as early as 1982. Check it out.

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A fine example of Camel(toe), domestic blend.
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Friday, October 10, 2008

It Came...Without Warning(1980)d/Greydon Clark

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An alien has descended from the heavens unto Earth to hunt man with the help of small,living,flying toothy discs that suction to their victims and eat their flesh.The film is loaded with B talent(Martin Landau,Jack Palance,Neville Brand,Cameron Mitchell,Larry Storch,and an early David Caruso appearance) and features creature and make up effects by Greg Cannon.Sound cool?It isn't.The single glaring reason I can drum up on why this film reeks like dog shit,is the all-too familiar director.Greydon Clark,the hack who brought us "Skinheads:Second Coming of Hate" and "Greystoke:The Legend of Tarzan",is the man responsible for this film's total failure.The one sheet for this waste of 89 minutes hung for years in my bedroom,and is probably the only good thing about it.The story,what little there is,goes like this:
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You think CSI:Miami's David Caruso(middle)ever mentions this film? Me neither.
A hunter(Cameron Mitchell) takes his liberal namby pamby son out into the wilderness to prove his manhood by shooting wildlife.He never gets the chance to do his old man proud,as he and his father are overtaken by wobbly hairy discs with teeth that fly awkwardly out of the dense underbrush.A troop leader(F Troop's Larry Storch)is lost in the same woods with his scouts,when the same discs wobble out of nowhere and dispatch the man in front of his terrified troop,who run screaming towards the river.A pair of couples(Caruso is one of them)planning a lake date,stop for gas at what seems to be a deserted station,when they are surprised by a kooky old man(Palance) who warns them to steer clear of the lake during "hunting season".They don't.Two get disc-sucked.Two escape.
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Newsflash!B movie actors terrorized by hairy tentacled flying personal pan pizzas with teeth.Story at eleven.
In the midst of the couple's escape,they stumble upon a shack in the woods,chock full of dead bodies.This is where the alien stores his "kills".They flee to a diner,inhabited by a bonkers Vietnam vet(Landau),Leo(Brand),and Joe Taylor(Palance),among others.The sarge still thinks he's knee deep in rice paddies,but Taylor demands that the terrified couple lead him to the alien's shack.Nothing happens for about forty minutes.The young girl's boyfriend eats it.She comes face to face with the alien,who stalks her back to Palance,who's set up explosives outside the shack.Landau,who shot the sheriff Bob Marley-style during a flashback,confronts the two and accuses them both of being aliens(!)before the real alien covers him with frisbees.Palance runs screaming at the alien,shouting,"ALIEN!ALIEEEEN!ALIIIIEN!"and the girl blows up the shack with the alien and Palance both in the scope of the blast.That's it.
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What's that on Christopher S. Nelson's face? An acting-sucker. What's it doing? Starving.
I'm thoroughly convinced that NOTHING Greydon Clark ever directed was any good,this sci fi/horror(?)cheapie being no exception.Clark builds zero tension,paces the film terribly,utilizes piss-poor lighting throughout most of the scenes,wastes a cast of able actors on awful dialogue,scrimps on effects shots,the list of fuck ups here is dismal and long(sort of like this movie).Thankfully unavailable on DVD as of this writing,let's hope it stays buried for another 28 years.Boots are highly sought after,but I can't recommend paying up to thirty dollars for a copy of this to even my worst enemy.Sandy!Push the plunger!ARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHH!Yeah.This gets:
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Kevin "Predator" Hall earns his paycheck in the last fifteen minutes of the movie.Sort of.
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