David Hess plus straight razor plus party full of snooty women equals cinematic GOLD!
When Ruggero Deodato(of "Cannibal Holocaust" fame)signed on the quintessential celluloid psychopath,David Hess(Last House on the Left,Autostop Rossosangue),and paired him with Italy's favorite whipping boy,Giovanni Lombardo Radice(City of the Living Dead,Cannibal Ferox,The Church),then gave them a supporting cast that included Lorainne DeSelle and Annie Belle to play with,I'm sure he KNEW what kind of magical insanity he'd end up with.He has since downplayed this film and questioned its merit,but let uncle B.W. set the record straight:They don't get any better than this!
David Hess as Alex,a modern day Barber of Seville.
Alex(Hess) works at a Park n' Lock in Manhattan,when he's not stealing cars,or raping/strangling petite blondes from discotheques.Ricky(Lombardo Radice)is his somewhat goofy pal,who channels Tony Manero from "Saturday Night Fever"(if he was retarded).When a couple of posh socialites(Annie Belle,Christian Borromeo)having some car trouble unwittingly look to the dynamic duo for help,Alex is more concerned with boogying,Ricky gets their engine purring in no time flat.Alex,taken with the girl's ample curves and silk stockings,puts a raincheck on discodancing,and decides to attend the couple's social gathering in New Jersey,with Ricky grinning sadistically in tow.Before they embark on the party,Alex backtracks to the locker in his office.Hmmmm,straight razor.I'm probably gonna need that.
At the party,Alex and Ricky are fish out of water,surrounded by well-to-do snobs who treat them like a sideshow exhibit.Lisa(Belle)is a pricktease of the highest caliber,not the least bit impressed by Alex's banana yellow blazer and vest,while Ricky mixes liquor,striptease,and boogying for the party guests,who laugh at his expense when he collapses to the ground in his underwear,all boogied out.Ricky joins the partygoers for a fixed game of cards,where he loses every round,while Alex joins Lisa for a relaxing shower upstairs,which she bows out of prematurely,leaving Alex with blue balls and a wet afro.At this point,Alex comes downstairs to supply Ricky with more cash,and oversee their dirty poker dealings.
Johnny Morghen gets to third base with Lorainne DeSelle.
When the snobs realize their snooty games are over,Howard and Tom(Gabriele Di Giulio,Christian Borromeo)try to ratpack Alex.Big mistake.Streetfighting you don't learn watching Savalas on tv(who Hess strongly resembles,only with an afro).Alex bashes Tom's face repeatedly into a tabletop,then beats Howard out to the inground pool,before kicking him into it,then pissing in his face as he helplessly struggles to climb out.Alex says,"Ho!Ho!Ho!Ha!Ha!Ha!",as the piss-covered partier is humiliated.Now,with the male(?) partygoers subdued,Alex lights a joint and the real party begins.Alex commands Ricky to rape Gloria(DeSelle)in front of the horrified guests,which he is unable to do.He manhandles Glenda(Marie Claude Joseph) and calls her "Roots",as she is bald and black.He takes Lisa upstairs and rapes her,which she starts to enjoy(!) halfway through.He slices Tom's face open with his razor,calls him a faggot repeatedly,then ties Howard up underneath a table,leaving him to watch the rest of his hijinks helplessly.Ricky chases after Gloria who tries to run for help,then scores a piece of sympathy-pussy from her outside the house.
Cindy...Oh,Cindy...Cindy,don't let me down.
Cindy(Brigitte Petronio),a flirty,pubescent virgin,rings the doorbell,and Alex kicks into high gear.He strips her in front of the guests and throws her to the couch,where he slashes her with his trusty straightrazor,laughing maniacally.At this point,Ricky decides Alex just may have taken their fun too far(!) and tries to stop him,earning himself a hearty belly slash from Alex's implement of Hell.The snobs then turn the tide on Alex,shooting him multiple times with a pistol they had hidden in a drawer(once in the junk...ouch!)as he screams in agony,falling into the pool in slow-motion.The partygoers reveal the whole thing was a setup,and that the blonde Alex raped and strangled at the outset was Tom's sister.They take pity on the wimpering Ricky,who is bleeding out on the floor.
They say you always remember your first time...and you WILL remember Alex,won't you?
Media Blasters dvd release of this cult classic stands as the one to buy,with Deodato/Hess/Lombardo Radice interviews,trailers,poster gallery,and a beautiful print of the film.Hess and Lombardo Radice are two of my favorite actors,Deodato one of my favorite directors,and this twisted tale of rape,torture,and revenge is guaranteed to satisfy.Some critics of the film claim it goes too far,but only a discodancing idiot would fail to see the movie's many strengths,strong characterizations and message therein.So,if you're up for some party fun,served up by David Hess(so long as you can overlook his full nude scene...blech.)give La Casa Sperduto nel Parco a try.As you think to yourself, it can't get any crazier,remember:You must be cartooning,the best is yet to come!
Four out of four B.W.'S
Johnny Morghen shows them how he really dances it:
.jpeg)
