B.W.'s Top Twenty Favorite Vampire Movies : Twenty to Eleven

Another Top Twenty list from your old pal Dubya, what a dynamic present for me during the holiday season, you've gotta be thinking to yourselves...Yeah. Anyway, it's the fiendish fanged folk that we'll be looking at this time around, and as you'll notice I've chosen my current favorite twenty films that deal with the subject. As you might have expected, Twilight (2008) did not make the list, and the same can be said for Lost Boys (1987), Coppola's Dracula (1992), Interview With the Vampire: The Vampire Chronicles (1994), and Fright Night (1985), none of which were really my bag, maaaann. Nonetheless, I've plucked examples from every cinematic era, from Universal to Hammer, representing American studios on to their European counterparts. It wasn't as easy compiling this list as I always seem to make it look (ha!), trust me, there were a few omissions that often occupy a deserved spot here, depending on my mood. Perhaps these are some films that might have earned a spot on some of your own favorites lists, which I expect to hear about, post-haste. We'll start the countdown with...


John Carpenter's Vampires (1998)  Probably the last Carpenter full-length film I enjoyed, to date. Glancing over his imdb page confirms it.


Vampire Circus (1974) Have you seen that screencap? The defense rests.


The Vampire Lovers (1970) A nifty Hammer Films riff on Carmilla, the famous gothic novella by Irish writer Sheridan Le Fanu, and the first installment of that studio's Karnstein trilogy, starring the likes of Peter Cushing, Ingrid Pitt, and Madeline Smith.


Vampyres (1974) Director Jose Ramon Larraz mixes ample doses of sex, sapphic and otherwise,  and violence with trance-like visuals here, and the brutal, bloody beauty of both Marianne Morris and Annulka is in full display throughout.


Twins of Evil (1971) Peter Cushing tries in vain to protect his twin nieces, as portrayed by Playboy's Collinson Twins (yum), from Count Karnstein (the third in Hammer's trilogy of the same name). One is innocent and chaste, the other one's quite taken with the idea of biting chaps on the neck and living forever, and not entirely opposed to getting her loverly bristols out, as pictured above.


Kiss of the Vampire (1962) Hammer Studios represent so many of my favorite movies since childhood, that the film that occupies number fifteen on the list should come as no surprise. Between the lavish gothic sets, the rich palette of colors, an atmospheric score by James Bernard, and that unusual ripper of a climax, this Don Sharp entry stands as an early vampiric masterpiece for the company.


Vampyr (1932) Danish director Carl Theodor Dryer provides us with the fourteenth movie, a dreamily shot, disorienting, often irrational masterpiece of early horror cinema.


Let's Scare Jessica to Death (1971) Nevermind Zohra Lampert's exasperating turn as the titularly unhinged Jessica, this moodily eerie and atmospheric, often dreamlike, low budget psychological thriller from the early seventies has always been among my favorites.


Salem's Lot (1979)  Lance Kerwin says "Pabisciutti Hill" and does magic tricks. Reggie Nalder hisses like a bucket full of gila monsters. James Mason dares you to match your faith against... the master's. Tobe Hooper at the helm of a television miniseries adaption of Stephen King's best-seller.


Terrore nello spazio aka/ Planet of the Vampires (1965) Bava's undeniably important, evocative horror/sci-fi hybrid is both claustrophobic and foggily ominous; brilliantly lit with splashy colors, stylishly framed, with effectively understated performances by the cast.

Honorable Mentions: Ganja and Hess (1973), La notte dei diavoli AKA/ The Night of the Devils (1972), La novia ensangrentada AKA/ The Blood Spattered Bride (1972), The Hunger (1983), Shadow of the Vampire (2000)

B.W.'s Top Twenty Sex Sirens of Cult Cinema : The Top Ten

                    10) Adrienne Barbeau

                              9) Gloria Guida
 
                 8) Cheryl "Rainbeaux" Smith

                        7) Rene Bond

                       6) Corinne Clery

                        5) Madeline Smith

                             4) Ewa Aulin

                             3) Annie Belle

                      2) Francoise Pascal

                   1) Christina Lindberg

"The Vampire Lovers"(1970)d/Roy Ward Baker

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"Frankenstein and the Monster From Hell"(1974)d/Terence Fisher

We'll close out November tonight by taking a closer look at director Terence Fisher's final effort, the sixth in Hammer's Frankenstein series and fifth and final appearance by the iconic Peter Cushing as the Baron.As such, it's a steadfast effort from a studio on the wane from its former genre success, so long as you can get around the absolutely lamentable creature makeup work from Eddie Knight, which kinda resembles an old Sicilian woman's grill slapped on top of a rubbery caveman jumpsuit.You gotta feel bad for poor David "Darth Vader" Prowse under all that bad latex, his second go as Frankenstein's monster for Hammer, 1970's Horror of, being his initial appearance.On the positive side, you've got the rare beauty of a mostly silent Madeline Smith to dress up your frame, and an emasciated-looking Peter Cushing rocking one of the more embarrassing dandy wigs ever committed to celluloid, truly a rupture-inducing blow to cinematic masculinity if ever there was such a thing.Watching him leap on Prowse's back the first time, I was pretty sure the wind might have taken him before he touched down.All joking aside, apart from the unfortunate makeup effects, the movie is actually pretty estimable, unique and atypical from the other series entries, with solid performances from Cushing, BBC staple John Stratton, Smith, Patrick "Second Doctor" Troughton as a bodysnatcher(!) with a taste for schnapps, and Shane Briant as Victor's unscrupulous young understudy.Fisher, who helmed all but two of the Frankenstein series for the studio, shrouds the film in a gothic and lugubrious tone, with more claret-splatter than the earlier productions(and even a few laughably out-of-scale miniatures).All-in-all, a fitting send off for Hammer(who would barely produce a genre ripple in the pond from here on out), the franchise(despite the painfully miserable pittance afforded to the budget), and the director, whose stringent framing and vigorous edits are on display for the last time.Onward!

I'd need hosing down, too, if I had to share the nuthouse with Madeline Smith.
A constable investigating the criminal enterprises of a shaky graverobber(Patrick Troughton) is lead to the quarters of one Simon Helder(Shane Briant), a young surgeon who's been unsuccessfully recreating the ungodly experiments of Baron Frankenstein.When the court sentences him to five years in the same insane asylum that once housed his mad inspiration, he's not exactly troubled by the concept.And when the asylum director's(John Stratton) two thuggish orderlies welcome him with continuous blasts from a power hose, he's rescued by Doctor Victor(Peter Cushing), the resident surgeon, who Helder immediately recognizes as Frankenstein himself.It seems the Baron has been blackmailing the perfidious director for a priviledged stay that includes the same uninterrupted forays into the scientific unknown that bought him the imprisonment in the first place.When Victor hears of Helder's admiration and surgical skills, the young man is quickly implanted as his personal assistant, making rounds to all the resident lunatics and even lending his steady hand in surgery, due to Frankenstein's burn-scarred mitts, replacing Sarah(Madeline Smith), the beautiful mute girl that most of the inmates are enamored with, and refer to as "The Angel".Helder doesn't take long to uncover the Baron's secret work, a pet project involving a homicidal prisoner named Schneider(David Prowse) who fancies jabbing people in the face with shards of broken glass(!), and whose bone-breaking suicide jump from a high window was thwarted by Frankenstein, who's been adding body parts to the hulking eyeless psychopath while subtracting them from previously living inmates, like a harmless old sculptor's(Bernard "M from the Bond movies" Lee) hands.The understudy improves upon Sarah's amateur stitch-job, unaware of the lengths Victor has gone and will go to see his work to come to fruition.

"Does Victor Frankenstein(Peter Cushing) have to look directly into the camera, Richard Dreyfuss-style, while wearing a dandy wig...well, does he?!!"
Before too long, the men are giving the brutish creature new eyes, and after Victor drives the resident mathematical genius/violinist,Professor Durendel(Charles Lloyd-Pack), to hang himself in his cell with his own violin strings, a new brain.Frankenstein coldly discards Herr Schneider's old grey matter, clumsily kicking it across the floor after stepping on it(!!).The creature, implanted with a new intellect, has little use for his fiddle and abruptly smashes it to pieces, but instantly recognizes his Angel, who's been assisting all along.The Baron becomes increasingly frustrated by the disdain his patchwork creation shows for the lessons he imposes upon it, treating it less like a human being than a disobedient pet, rushing to tranquilize the thing the instant it trashes equipment or picks up a broken glass container, lapsing into the original fiend it was built from.Victor tells Helder the unfortunate incidents surrounding Durendel's violent outbursts, which stemmed from bursting in on the director as he molested Sarah, the knowledge of such events the foundation for Frankenstein's blackmail plot.With Durendel's brain inside the bulky neanderthal frame, the creature turns again to bloody vengeance, wounding Victor during his escape, and finally throat-shanking the perverted director with a broken bottle the way he always wanted to.With the entire asylum in an uproar as the misshapen monster digs up the fresh graves in the graveyard outside, Sarah breaks her film-long silence as the orderlies fill the thing's belly with hot lead before the other inmates tear it asunder amidst screams and laughter.Though Helder is shaken by the turn of events and the duo's failure, Frankenstein optimistically suggests that they will persevere and carry on their experiments, regardless of this blood-soaked setback.I love happy endings.

Mitt-less in a pine box, too ignominious of an end for me, personally.
To Fisher's credentials, you'll find his name in the directorial credits of all the finest Hammer genre movies ever produced:Horror of Dracula(1958), Curse of Frankenstein(1957), Revenge of Frankenstein(1958), The Mummy(1959), The Hound of the Baskervilles(1959), The Brides of Dracula(1960), Curse of the Werewolf(1961), Phantom of the Opera(1962), The Gorgon(1964), Dracula:Prince of Darkness(1966), Frankenstein Created Woman(1967), The Devil Rides Out(1967), Frankenstein Must Be Destroyed(1969), and tonight's entry.Cushing, who worked with Fisher no less than fourteen times(a distant second place to Tim Burton and Johnny Depp...why don't you guys marry each other already) in his long and prestigious acting career that dated back to 1939(!), has to be firmly cemented into any self-respecting horror nut's all-time top five actors, period.Smith, who you might remember as Sean Connery's Italian bed decoration in Live and Let Die(1973), has an impressive genre resume herself, appearing in movies like Taste the Blood of Dracula(1970), The Vampire Lovers(1970), and Theater of Blood(1973).On the scale, Monster From Hell checks in with two respectable bigguns, an entertaining epitaph, indeed.Recommended.

"Does the Frankenstein monster(David Prowse) have to shank a loonie in the labonza with a broken bottle...Does he?!!"