"Two On The Road AKA/ Fearless Dragons" (1980) d/ Li Chao

It's been a minute since we've covered any gung fu, so tonight, to set the Yin and Yang into balance again, we'll be taking a look at the Goldig Films production of a 1980 kung fu comedy directed by Li Chao, the man who gave you 1982's Billy Chong/Willy Dozan vehicle,  Kung Fu From Beyond the Grave, and starring no less than "Beardy" aka/ Liang Chia-Jen and Phillip Ko Fei. If that wasn't enough, Johnny Wang himself dons the grey wig and mustache combo as a mayor who may or may not be on the up and up. I think you can figure out how this is all gonna end up already...


"If boulders were currency, I still wouldn't share with ya.", notes Lively Dragon (Liang Chia-Jen).
At the same time that Lively Dragon (Liang Chia-Jen) reluctantly gives Crazy Horse (Philip Ko Fei) a cart ride, the Mayor (Wang Lung Wei) has dispatched a shipment of coins as relief to local refugees with a large weapon-bearing entourage in tow, to protect it. Is it any wonder that both carts cross paths, just as the donations are set upon by bandits on the road? I wasn't surprised. In the melee, Dragon heists the cart, but finds the money already stolen and the chest filled with rocks upon closer inspection. With wanted posters springing up all over town with depictions of Horse emblazoned on them, and the Mayor's fedora-clad associate (Chiang Tao) leading the investigation, Dragon sets a trap for him, both to warn him of the impending fuzz on his tail, and to collect his cash reward himself, of course. At the same time, Golden Jaws (Siu Gam), the Chinese mutant giant cousin of Jaws (who's off working with James Bond, apparently) has been biting random people to death with his spiffy auriferous teefers.


Beardy and Ko Fei are prisoners of Chiang Tao, who's a slave to that ridiculous hat.
The two men set out to find the true gold thief, robbing each other back and forth and ultimately getting themselves thrown in a cell by Fedora after he threatens to torture them in a red white and blue "games room" that has a seat with obligatory spike that goes where the sun doesn't shine. Our boys name drop 1978's Midnight Express as they bust out the cell wall (what era is this set in, anyway?), only to empty out into the cell of a horse-faced nymphomaniac. There's also a behemoth babe (Tsui Oi Sam) who accidentally crushes her husbands on their wedding night, one turning his toes up while our heroes are hilariously hidden under their honeymoon bed. They pose as travelling scholars to investigate the lame legged Mayor as a potential suspect, and combine to wear out Golden Jaws in a silly fight that ends with the giant pissing himself as he falls unconscious. In the end, it's Dragon and Horse vs. the Mayor (surprise, it was Johnny Wang all along.) in a marathon match of martial skill as they interrupt his sneaky getaway with the stolen loot.


"Movement number three...Chinese strongman carries your mother's ass to bed."
After 65 appearances as an actor in these films, in titles ranging from Bruce Lee and I (1976), Eighteen Jade Arhats (1978), and Challenge of the Masters (1976),  Cantonen Iron Kung Fu (1979) was Li Chao's first film in the director's chair, having earned over thirty credits there in the years since, on films like 1994's Shaolin Avengers, Struggle For Leader (1983), and 1981's Ninja Supremo. Beardy, on the other hand, has appeared in over one hundred and thirty films, and directed only ten. He's still one of my favorites, even though he's nowhere near as prolific as Ko Fei, who acted in over two hundred movies and directed over twenty, himself. The payoff in this one, is obviously the final showdown between these two and Wang Lung Wei, which is lengthy and as amazing as one could expect out of these guys. Three Wops, and required viewing for any Asian action enthusiasts out there. Hunt it down.


Hold on to your sash, it's about to get fightastic out here.

"Men From the Monastery" (1974) d/ Chang Cheh

We'll spinning wheel kick off September with the second of Shaw Brothers director Chang Cheh's Shaolin series, utilizing the martial prowess of his first stable actors like Chen Kuan Tai, Fu Sheng, and Chi Kuan Chun to illustrate the further struggles of legendary patriots Fang Shih Yu and Hung Hsi Kwan against those oppressive Manchu bastards and their murderous jealousy of the effectiveness of Shaolin kung fu, as choreographed by the one and only Liu Chia Liang (Tang Chia, as well, to be specific). For those keeping score at home, Heroes Two was the first of the series, released the previous year.


"Couldn't we just beat each other up on the ground and be done with it?"
At the outset, we meet Fang Shih Yu (Fu Sheng) as he's about to undergo a test at Shaolin known as "Death Alley" where he's forced to mix it up with his classmates in a darkened chamber in levels of increasing difficulty, vs. the bo, the butterfly swords, two sectional staff, etc. He states that he's fully aware that if he happens to be killed in his attempt, then he simply wasn't any good. As candles are lit and extinguished, he blows through all successive comers with ease and escapes with his life despite a half-baked hit by Manchu plants. Waving his trademark white fan wherever he goes, he duels Tiger Yang to the death atop some strategic fighting poles, and after skewering him like a chunk of lamb meat on a spit,  he soon runs into Hu Hueh Chien (Chi Kuan Chun), a stubborn young fellow with a death wish ever since his father got stepped on like a waterbug by two sore loser Manchus at the gambling house, as he's having his latest ass whooping administered to him by the Manchu bullies. Fang helps him to escape and tells him to go to Shaolin and learn how to fight before taking on expert opponents.Luckily, Fang's special baths at Shaolin have also made him impervious to weapons and blows of all kinds, save for one pesky secret unprotected area that....well, let's not get ahead of ourselves here.


"Guess what you're having for dinner, pal...neck chops! Huaaaaaa!"
Fang and Hu set up his father's murderers, who Hu beats to death for their sins, which alerts even heavier Manchu baddies to the Shaolin upstarts, as led by Chiang Tao himself, who amuses himself by capturing and killing rebels whenever he can. The bastard even sets fire to Shaolin (with footage culled from the aforementioned Heroes Two, no less) in trying to flush out Hung Hsi Kwan (Chen Kuan Tai), the rebel leader who's been in hiding, leading to all surviving patriots involved scattering like ashes and regrouping at an abandoned temple that nobody'd ever think twice about looking there for them. Well, except the Manchus, who put tails on Hu's girlfriend and have the place surrounded by archers in no time. You know what comes next. It's Shaolin vs. Manchu to the overly dramatic death on the temple steps, with more bloody deaths in black and white than you can shake a Tiger's Fork at, but you folks at home are gonna have to see this one for yourselves to fully appreciate it, and also to find out if the Shaolin martial flame lives on.


"Alright Shaolin disciples, get into your dramatic battle stances, places everybody!"
I can still remember taping this one late one Saturday night back in the eighties off of Channel 29's Kung Fu Theater. The print I saw recently,  reminded me of the shabby vhs quality of my own dub, with tracking lines and ghosts a plenty. Those were the days, eh? Cheh would revisit the Shaolin backdrop and plotline with Shaolin Temple/ Death Chamber (1976), Five Masters of Death/ Five Shaolin Masters (1974), and Shaolin Martial Arts (1974), all of which also use many of the same actors you'll see here. He also helmed 1975's Disciples of Shaolin/ Invincible One, which also starred Fu Sheng and Chi Kuan Chun. Though I don't dig this one nearly as much as any of the titles above, probably due to many of the fights involving anyone other than Fu, Chi, or Chen looking choppy and uninspired in spots (a problem the studio smoothed out over time, with more adept scrappers handling the intricate fight moves with a much better flow for the big screen, I think), it's still a classic in it's own right, deserving of three Wops on the scale, and coming recommended to any fans of the genre.


"Movement number six, Manchu pierces the flaming hemorrhoid!"

"Holy Flame of the Martial World" (1983) d/ Chin Lu Ku

By 1983, the legendary Shaw Brothers had pretty much exhausted every traditional gung fu interpretation of historical Chinese legend, every high-kicking superstar pair up a fan of cinematic pugilism could dream of, so it's no wonder when translating a popular Hong Kong comic book to the silver screen, director Chin Lu Ku pulled out every imaginable stop in delivering a deliriously crazy, special effects-heavy wushu fantasy, packed with laser beams, flying personified Chinese characters, pugilist magic, 32 year old Kuo "The Lizard" Chui and 23 year old Liu Hsueh-hua playing grey-haired clan elders(!), and I'm pretty sure I saw the martial sink hurl past the lens on a wire on more than one occasion, too. Also aboard for the visually dazzling ride are the likes of Pai Piao, Chiang Tao, Mary Jean Reimer (former wife of eldest Liu, Liu Chia-Liang himself!), and Chan Shen.


You-ming Elder's (Kuo Chui) "Deadly Echoes" technique will make your whole brain bubble and your body disintegrate. His words, not mine.
After their parents are martially snuffed by a pair of scheming power-hungry baddies (ain't that always the case?), Monster Yu (Pai Piao) and Tsing Yin (Liu Hsueh-hua), a pair of babies' lives are saved by the intervention of the Elder of the You-ming (Kuo Chui),  who takes the male child under his wing for eighteen years, while Tsing Yin mothers the female under the pretense that You-ming Elder is responsible for her parents' deaths. After the allotted time passes, a fully grown Yin Tien-chou (Mok Siu Chung) is sent on a perilous quest for the fabled Holy Flame sword, battling murderous ghosts and rescuing a snake bladder merchant's daughter named Chuan (Mary Jean Reimer) from the Bloodsucking Clan along the way. After he solves a dangerous yin-yang platform inside Moon Cave, where Chinese characters spin through the air like bladed self-aware weapons, he retrieves the plastic-looking Yang half of the Holy Flame, then again rescues Chuan from the Bloodsucking HQ, where their elder (Chiang Tao) uses the blood of young girls to resurrect a blue English-speaking mummy(!). When Tsing Yin shows up, she nearly defeats Yin, except that Chuan has developed a super laser-shooting finger, from a snake bladder venom infection (of course) that allows the young couple to escape. You with me, so far?


It's gotten so that a girl can't even gather snakes with her father without getting harassed by the Bloodsucking Clan.
It turns out that the evil Tsing has the equally plastic Yin half of the Holy Flame, but it can only be wielded by an eighteen year old female virgin(!!) like Yin's sister Tan (Yeung Jing-Jing), who eventually learns the truth about her family from "Snake Boy" (Wen Hsueh-Er, a girl) and reunites with her brother, who's been learning how to fly his sword around like a radio-controlled helicopter from You-ming Elder. Except Monster Yu and Tsing have developed a counter to his hilarious-looking Ghostly Laugh/Deadly Echoes technique, where they can close their ears up like shuttered windows (I'm not making this up). If that isn't enough, their magic pugilism has become so powerful they can explode their foes into meaty skeletons without so much as a touch. In the end, it's gonna take both orphans and both halves of the Holy Flame, not to mention many brightly colored light effects, explosions, and much wire work to bring this one to a close, that's for sure...


Yin Tien-Chou (Mok Siu Chung) practices his "Flashy Visual Effects" style.
This film would be another feather in Kuo Chui's storied cap, enjoying a career as a fight choreographer, having ably handled that task as far back as Chang Cheh's Ten Tigers of Kwangtung in 1979 and staging the fights for over sixty films in all, with titles like The Story of Ricky (1992), Erotic Ghost Story (1990), The Peacock King (1989), and John Woo's Hard Boiled (1992) to follow, and even appearing in James Bond vehicle Tomorrow Never Dies (1997) along the way. His reputation for excellence in Asian action films is well-deserved and uncontested. Mok Siu-Chung, appearing in only his second feature here, will have acted in well over eighty by the time of this writing, including titles like Once Upon a Time in China II (1992) and Sammo Hung's Pedicab Driver (1989). Four Wops here, you gotta see this one to believe it, and afterwards, you still might not.


Rock-paper-smoke-electricity is the game you play once your gung fu's good enough.

"Dynamo" (1978) d/ Hwa I Hung

Yeah, set aside that Game of Death(1979) tracksuit in the one sheet  for a moment (besides, he wears two different JKD tracksuits in this one), as such Brucesploitative imagery might sour you on an otherwise entertaining Ho Tsung Tao(Bruce Li) movie; Ho being the most  recognizable of all the Lee imitators and the one with the largest body of work, having appeared in thirty-eight movies dating back to the Taiwanese production, Death Duel(1972). Despite being peppered with a supporting cast of the usual overmatched suspects (i.e. Ku Feng, Chiang Tao), this one gets by with passable fight choreography provided by Yuen Cheung-Yan, but eyes familiar to the more dynamic stunt work of Jacky Chan, Sammo Hung, or Liu Chia Liang might find these brawls as primitive as a pair of cave bearskin knickers. Still, the odd rapport between Ho and Ku is laugh-worthy enough, and let's not forget about those "Bruce Lee and I"(1976) inserts.

 
"The bottle ends before these Bruce Lee rip-offs ever will...", gurgles Teacher Chow (Ku Feng).
A movie producer named Miss Mary arrives in Hong Kong for Bruce Lee's funeral ("They wouldn't sink so low as to include actual Bruce Lee funeral footage here, would they?", he asked knowingly) and manages to catch cab driver Lee Ting Yee (Bruce Li) putting the hurt on some common street trash, offering him ten grand a month as salary to be the next big action star on the silver screen. She hires a heavy boozer named Chow (Ku Feng) as Lee's Sifu, and he informs his student, "Feel free to attack me any time, because I'll do the same." A strange request, to be sure, but Lee obliges, and suddenly attacks his elder at every juncture. Lee also often dreams of the real Bruce (or Danny Lee doing a pretty bad Bruce Lee imitation from another movie, if you've got eyes), and before long he finds himself in similar shoes to the late kung fu actor.

 
"Sometime when we touch, honesty too much."
The cabbie turned actor's sudden popularity draws the ire of rival movie producer named Mr. George who sends random gangs of toughs to every country that Lee is filming in, leading to a headache-inducing number of  attacks in what's supposed to be America (it isn't even), Hong Kong, Japan, and Korea, sating the viewer's need to see a bellhop fight, and even James Bond-style ski slope brawls, but Lee reigns triumphant over all comers, forcing George and his cronies to up the ante by kidnapping Lee's girlfriend and forcing him to throw a fight in an upcoming martial arts tournament if he ever wants to see her alive. Natually, Chow helps rescue her in the nick of time, and Lee wins his match in the end, but he gives up the glamorous movie lifestyle for good, having had enough of it, and returns to happier times as a cab driver.


"I'm not Bruce Lee either!", boasts Li Hsiu-Hsien, in a scene from a different movie altogether.
The plot of tonight's review mirrors lead actor Ho Tsung Tao's rise to fame, much like his later effort, The Chinese Stuntman/ Counter Attack (1981).You might notice Steve Sander, also an extra in Enter the Dragon(1973),  in one of the fight scenes, in his trademark funky stocking cap, can you dig it, baby? Director Hwa would go on to work with Billy Chong on Crystal Fist (1979), A Hard Way To Die(1979), and Kung Fu Zombie (1981). Perceptive readers might wonder how one of the better Bruce Li efforts only merits two wops on the scale, but I think that rating speaks volumes on how much worse most of his other stuff really was. Then again, compared to the next most prolific Lee imitators, Huang Kin Lung(Bruce Le) and Dragon Lee, whose collective unwatchable stink-bomb rate is prodigious as all fuck, average is pretty much as good as it gets in this subgenre.

 
"Sayyy, are those Swingster ski pants?"
 

"Kung Fu Zombie"(1981)d/Hwa I Hung

Kung fu horror-comedies were pretty popular at the box office back in the glorious eighties, with titles like Mr. Vampire and Close Encounters of the Spooky Kind making lucrative bank in their theatrical runs.Eternal Films took their own shot at it with Hwa I Hung's Wu long tian shi zhao ji gui(say that five times fast with a mouth fulla beans, I dare ya), known internationally as Kung Fu Zombie, a briskly-paced supernatural mix of Asian blood-spitting magic, vengeful ghosts, supercharged Buddhist vampires, plenty of the martial stuff in-between, and a goodly portion of "Holy FUCK!" throughout.Normally, I'm not real big on mixing my genres.When I want horror, I watch horror.If I'm feeling like martial arts, then I throw one in.The one obvious exception to that rule would be this movie.Played mostly for laughs of a moronic nature and anchored firmly with a micro-budget, Zombie ended up being something of a hit in Hong Kong, earning HK$ 2,237,587, due to the highly enjoyable straightjacket insanity transpiring within.

Pang(Billy Chong) just wants his due.Got that? His...due.
Lu Dai(Jeng Kei Ying) is a petty criminal with a debt of vengeance to repay to a wise-assed young martial expert named Pang(Billy Chong), who meddled in his affairs and got him locked up for it.Aiding Dai in his quarrel are a merry band of blundering jagoffs that includes a Taoist priest(Chan Lau) who dabbles in the black arts.Their scheme is nothing if not fucking ridiculous: Lure Pang to the cemetery for a duel, then use magic to reanimate some cadavers to push him into an open grave with a coffin lined with daggers in it.Of course, it fails miserably, with Dai ending up poked full of holes and dead in the box...and struck by lightning of the hand-scratched film variety.His ghost, hysterical at the sight of his own mutilated corpse, demands that the fumbling priest find him a new body forthwith.During the body-shopping process, Dai uses his ectoplasmic invisibility to frame the priest in a busy restaurant, using ghost hands to feel up a prostitute, who turns and slaps six shades of spinning shit outta the innocent priest, who tumbles into an incoming Chinese heiffer's fat booze-umms, which he bounces off of repeatedly for optimum comic effect before she falls on top of him the way fat people often do in kung fu comedies.The priest's body-switching ceremonies don't go so well either, when he tries to insert Dai's spirit into a body at the morgue, it turns out the guy just happened to be a martial expert(Kwan Yung Moon) sleeping in a coffin for the fuck of it, until his big vengeance duel with the same young hothead Dai is after.Pang's father(Chiang Tao)trains him to endure fights that last two hours or more to be ready for Lung, who Pang cockily sends back to the morgue with precious little fanfare.The priest tries to insert Dai into the fighter's body a second time, but only succeeds in turning the murderous bastard into a full-fledged vampire!

Lu Dai(Jeng Kei Ying), put your old body away.It stinks.
To further complicate matters, Pang's father eats heart-seizing death while getting loaded and playing with the reward money for Lung's body, providing Dai with his final opportunity for a new body(you only get three chances,apparently)and revenge against Pang.The priest only manages to make half-good on his promise, causing Dai, now in Pang's dad's body, to hunt all his brothers-in-crime, who safeguard against him in a number of ways: one gets arrested(ghosts can't cross the law), one becomes a piss-poor excuse for a monk(he's kicked out after frying up a puppy!), and the priest, well, he just wears a leaf hat(!), that makes him invisible to Dai, and ridiculous to everybody else.Meanwhile Lung is rewriting vampire folklore, attacking people during the day, and kicking the heads off of peasants and leaning over the geysering neck stumps like a kid at a high school water fountain, to hungrily gulp down the red stuff(!!).Of course, this all leads up to the final confrontation between Pang and Lung, with the remaining members of Dai's gang trying to pull his spirit out of Pang's father's body in the process.During their supernatual rowdydow, Lung's fists and foot suddenly catch fire as his head starts to smoulder(!!!), with the vampire using them to strike at Pang.Somewhere out of left field, a monk appears and drapes Buddhist prayer beads around Pang's neck, slapping protective holy yellow post-its all over his torso, before pushing him back out into the battle zone.Huh?!!!The vampire's flaming extremities burn away most of Pang's protection, but in the nick of time, the young hero remembers to wrap the prayer beads around the vampire's neck, jump effortlessly into the branch of a tree some twenty-five feet up, strangling the blood drinker while breaking off a piece of branch stump and ramming it repeatedly into the top of the vampire's head, killing him.Whaaaa??!!??Insert four exclamation points here.

"I'm having dramatic slo-mo chest pains!Where's my Chinese Life Alert?"
Despite some sped up action and chase scenes(for Benny Hill-style comedy hijinks,methinks),Billy Chong is high-kickingly amazing as always, especially when squared off with Kwan Yung Moon, an equally impressive fighter.I should also mention at this point that Cheng Hong Yip played the character of "Hamster"(that's right).You should be able to snag a copy of this one for next to nothing at your local video clearance outlet or FYE, if you can't locate one on Amazon.A restored, remastered special edition is just crying to be released some day soon.It deserves no less.On the scale, the highest possible rating for nearly immeasurable laughs and martial arts entertainment.The right way to mix kung fu, horror, and comedy.

Let's see Van Helsing jump effortlessly 25 feet up a tree, strangling a vampire with buddhist prayer beads, before ramming a tree branch into the top of his head repeatedly.

"Super Power"(1980)d/Lam Chin-Wai

A vengeful hex upon the rascals at Verizon for making it near to impossible to log in here at the Wop for the past week or so, it's a minor miracle I was able to do so tonight and get back to where we started from like Maxine Nightingale used to croon back in the mid-seventies.First up,we've got some kung fu for you to wrap your sashes around,so put your seven sectional steel whip down momentarily and read on,little brothers and sisters...
Tonight's review was another popular entry on Channel Five in the eighties, displaying the martial dominance of Billy Chong, a successful kung fu actor who rode the sash-edge of Jacky Chan to stardom during that exciting period in chopsocky flicks.When last we examined Chong's work, I expressed feelings that some of his films suffered from lack of competent villains to pair the gifted Indonesian-born expert against, and nowhere is that more evident than in tonight's movie, a kitchen sink of flowery named fighting styles juxtaposed against Chong's signature leg fighting and muscle tone.Hau Chiu-Sing tries his luck here,and his unimpressive lack of fluidity is simply no match for Chong, painfully evident from the first time we see him practicing his awkwardly named(and executed)Horse Face Fist.Director Lam tries to level the playing ground by inserting several phony trampoline-enhanced stunts, played both forward and in reverse, only succeeding in making the inequality between his star and his antagonists that much more evident.The soundtrack borrows tracks directly from familiar Hollywood fare like The Ten Commandments.Despite these shortcomings, Power does showcase its leading man quite well, with several solid form sequences and fights, and I'm confident that fans of Billy Chong will enjoy the movie anyway.Forward!

Chun Ming(Billy Chong) lives to: a)kung fu fight and b)tease Fatty.
Kang Si Man(Hau Chiu-Sing)is called to his dying father's bedside, where he's told of his father's shameful loss to five different masters years earlier.He's given a special training manual for the Horse Face Fist, a devastating technique that few have mastered and vows to defeat the modern proponents of those five teachers to return glory to his family name, with the help of his two brothers(Chiang Tao and Ho Kei-Cheong), two Eagle Claw stylists.Meanwhile, Mr. Wan(Lau Dan)is struggling to keep a tight rein on his impudent son, Chun Ming(Billy Chong), who shows little interest in the book studies he's being tutored in, or even Sau Yee(Annie Liu On-Lai), the young girl his family has arranged for him to marry.Kang challenges and defeats Wan's friend, Lin, then arranges for a dinner between all the masters, where he instigates duels between them, only stepping in afterwards to pick up the pieces.When Chun defeats Mr. Liu's son in a forest battle, Kang later blinds the young man in an attempt to frame Wan's son, but drops his snuff bottle at the crime scene, where the fight is witnessed by Sau, dressed as a man in public to glimpse her future husband.

"Before I marry a man, I'm going to see him." How picky of you, Sau Yee(Annie Liu On-Lai)!
Wan receives a challenge letter from Kang, which he sends back without a response, enfuriating young Chun, who prefers to settle all disputes with his fists and feet.Chun and Sau connect, despite the best efforts of each to remain unattached, and he playfully shows her the basis for his powerful Natural Fist style in the nearby forest through some impressive form work.Wan calls upon an old master, Chao Ming(Wong Chi-Ming, the film's fight choreographer) to instruct his son in countering the mysterious Horse Face Fist of Kang, but the stubborn Chun refuses to learn until the wily sifu bests him in a contest in a room full of antique valuables.Chao teaches him the basics of Northern and Southern Eagle Claw then prepares him for the circular attack patterns of Kang's technique using bricks and flour-dipped fists(!).Chun beats Kang's brothers one at a time, then cockily accepts his challenge letter, guaranteeing a victorious outcome.Ming mocks Kang throughout their final battle then dispatches him once and for all, returning glory to Wan's school and the Natural Fist style.

Don't mess with the Dohzan:Smell it...smell it...smell it...now take it.
Chong's always been one of my personal favorites, and tonight's review received regular screenings at my place through the years, despite the otherwise mediocre martial arts on display within, due to the enthusiastic superbly powered performance of its headliner.In days to come we'll be looking at more solid efforts from Eternal Films and Chong himself, so stay tuned for those, as always.On the scale Power rates two big ones, worth a look for those martial practicioners and enthusiasts who gaze upon Billy Chong with any sort of favour.Check it out.

As always, Chong's leg skills are second to none.

"Kung Fu Executioner"(1981)d/Lam Chin-Wai

We'll kick the night off here with a knock down, drag out slice of murderous martial mayhem from the Channel 5 days of mid-Saturday afternoon-in-the-eighties kung fu goodness.Now, some might be inclined to slag off the venerable Billy Chong as little more than Eternal Films copycat answer to Jacky Chan's worldwide breakout success at the time, and his earlier work in films like Crystal Fist/Jade Claw(1979) and Super Power(1980) might only reaffirm that notion for some, but personally, I've always felt Chong was a step above imitators or clones; a chiseled fighter brimming with screen presence and personality whose Tae Kwon Do-trained legs always stretched higher than most of his peers.Sadly for kung fu fanatics, he only managed to blaze through a handful of movies before dropping off the martial map, a direct result of Eternal's seeming inability to match their inexhaustible lead with a villain of near to or equal fighting skills(watch an early era Jacky Chan period piece to see what I'm talking about), causing them to close the distance during the final fight sequences in most of his work with more acrobatic stunt doubles for the antagonists, clumsily handled trick photography, or boosted film speeds.
Tonight's review, a period piece set in twenties Shanghai, reunites Chong with dynamite black-titioner Carl R. Scott, who he'd shared top billing with in the earlier American settler period-based Sun Dragon/A Hard Way to Die(1979).Executioner is a grimly disturbing pot boiler that borrows generously from Coppola's The Godfather(1972) with surprising levels of gore, sex, and mondo-style animal cruelty peppered in throughout the rare uncut Ocean Shores print, from which the scan of my custom cover(based on the Cantonese language print sleeve I scored in Chinatown all those years ago), as handled by the honorable Doctor-san, originates.A supporting cast headed by veteran belligerent bad guys extraordinaire Chan Sing and Chiang Tao keeps the derivative revenge-based tale flowing like sweet leaved tea.

Two times five across the eyes cuts Kuen Kong's(Billy Chong) opponents down to size.
Following an impressive form sequence by Scott and Chong over the credits featuring brick-breaking, escrima, nunchaku, and nine sectional steel whip kata, Li Kuen Kong(Billy Chong)returns to Shanghai from studies abroad to find his family immersed in a stand off with a gaggle of unscrupulous criminals,lead by ruthless murderer, Hung Chun Fai(Chen Sing) who's recently escaped from prison(and traveling on the same train as Li, who notices Hung's handcuff scars during the ride), over opium trafficking.Aiding Hung in pressuring Li's successful father into investing in the drugs, are Gawa Shima(Chiang Tao), a Japanese thug with an army of swordsmen at his disposal, and former brothel madam-turned-casino owner, venemous Chan Yim Hung(Lily Lan Yu-Li).At first, Kuen Wei does his best to keep his prodigal son from getting involved in the dirty dealings(several sneaky labonza shanks and throat slittings follow), preferring to allow Li to practice martial arts with his older brother, Ysun Nam(Chan Yau-San) and family friend, Donny(Carl R. Scott), but when Hung puts the squeeze on the elderly man, hanging Ysun Nam's dog's bloody, severed head from an awning(blech), and later botching Kuen Wei's public stabbing, the young martial artist is inevitably drawn into the mix.

The Godfather's severed horse head gets downsized in Asia.
With Kuen Wei hospitalized and Ysun Nam angrily locked away in a workout room after thugs kill his wife in their bed, Hung appeals to Li to sanction the business deal himself before more of his family meet their respective makers.Meanwhile, Chan uses Li's cousin, a degenerate gambler who's amassed large debts at the casino, to free Ysun Nam, who immediately rushes blindly to his wife's killers for vengeance.Hung and Shima oblige him by kicking his face through some plate glass.Meanwhile, Chan and Shima plan a side deal to become sole partners eliminating Hung in the process, which backfires when she tries to shank him after a graphic shower/sex scene.Hung repays her loyalty by cutting her throat.After Kuen Wei is finally dispatched while convalescing at home by Hung's signature sword-cane, Li and Donny leap into revenge-fueled retributive action at last.Hung's cabbie sporting blade man fights Donny at a paper mill, and ends up impaled through the chest on a spiked crane like a human log, ready for processing.Li digs into his suitcase full of weapons, taking on all of Shima's swordsmen in the forest with extendable nunchaku.He then squares off against Shima, kicking him into a bloody mess(cut from the television edit) when Hung arrives for the final showdown.A lengthy battle ensues with Li fending off Hung's cane sword with tonfa and nunchaku before both men square up for some good old fashioned hand to hand(foot to foot?).Li erases the criminal with a spinning double front kick to the throat that sends Hung flying backwards into a tree, smashing the back of his skull against the bark.Afterwards, Kuen Kong vows to pick up the pieces of his life with the help of his girlfriend and Donny.

Mr. Shima(Chiang Tao)'s facial forecast:Fully fucked
In some countries, tonight's review was confusingly packaged as a Carl Scott starring vehicle where he's referred to as "Black Jim".Though he enjoys several fights (excellently choreographed by Leung Siu-Chung) throughout the film, he's plainly on board in guest star capacity to Billy Chong's lead.Chong would follow this one up with the crazy Kung Fu Zombie(1981) and excellent Sun Chung collaboration A Fistful of Talons(1983) before retiring to his native Indonesia, where he married a pop star, fathered kids, starred in and directed a hit television series, and instructed martial arts to the country's military.Executioner is a solid effort, with some breathtaking fight choreography that Chong, who's always got a spot in my top 5, effortlessly executes as always.Three big ones.

I can't hear you, Hung(Chen Sing), you've got a flying side kick in your mouth.