"Godzilla 2000" (1999) d/ Takao Okawara

Tonight, I'm the bearer of both good and bad tidings here at the Wop. Bad, first: This review will wrap up the specialty month of Kai-June. I had planned on writing about several more movies before June ended, but they don't call it summer for nothing. Since we've already covered what I believe to be the best all around Godzilla movie to date here, some nine years ago, I figured we could close up shop this time around on a similarly high note, with the first in the Godzilla Millennium series, which also happens to be the first Japanese movie to utilize a completely cgi-Goji in a shot while lessening the overall impact of miniatures. Fear not, purists. It all works somehow. And then some.


"Park by Macy's I said! This is the last time I let you drive the flying saucer in the mall parking lot..."
By the turn of the twenty-first century, Godzilla is a devastating nuisance to his native Japan, meriting a "Godzilla Prediction Network", that studies the great beast at every opportunity like he was a tornado with dorsal spikes and nuclear breath. Elsewhere, the science chappies have uncovered a UFO dormant in the Japan Trench for the past sixty million years, that awakens just as they're in the process of raising it for further studies, and flies off. Unaware that Japan's defense forces are equipped with full metal missiles that will undoubtedly pass through him like fecal matter in a goose's turd cutter, Godzilla carries out a fierce attack anyway when the flying saucer suddenly interrupts, looking for genetic hand outs from the big green goliath. When Godzilla is defeated by the interstellar interloper, he retreats underwater to rejuvenate himself a la Gamera, while the ship hits the pause button, landing itself on terra firma,  to recharge it's own space batteries. Everybody needs a break, man.


"Jump over my tentacles! Bubble gum! Bubble gum! Five cents a packet!"
Shinoda (Takahiro Murata), the head of GPN, discovers that the secret to Godzilla's constant cell regeneration lie in something called Organizer G1, but the alien craft soon obtains the knowledge and heads for Shinjuku, where it lands atop Tokyo Opera City Tower, and begins to hack all of Japan's computers for more information. While changing the surrounding atmosphere to better suit it, the ship issues an obligatory invasion message to all Earthlings, as it seeks out Godzilla DNA so that it might transform into something more comfortable for it's coming efforts. Godzilla makes the scene, and takes down the UFO, but not before it can absorb some of Big G's mojo, transforming itself into a monstrous Millennian before the DNA takes control of the hulking form, changing it even more drastically into the monster, Orga, whose giant mitts pack a serious wallop. Godzilla v Orga for bragging rights over the planet, with no time limits, and to the death. Just the way you want your kaiju movies to wrap up. Check it out to see how it finishes!


"C'mere, you ticklish? Coochie coochie coo..."
I'd merit a guess that the drastically divergent Mire-Goji here is the natural adult progression of Godzilla, Jr., who survived the eye-popping, jaw-dropping finale of Godzilla vs Destoroyah (1995). He'd reappear in the next entry, Godzilla vs. Megaguirus, the following year, with a lighter green skin tone and brighter spikes, before undergoing further modifications for his 2002 scrap against Mechagodzilla, who'd undergone some big changes himself by then. Despite a few flubbed effects match ups here and there, 2000 remains one of my favorite Godzilla movies, with a script made wittier for Western audiences ("those full metal missiles will go through Godzilla like crap through a goose!", for example.), packed to the dorsal spikes with loads of good giant monster action, and the most wicked-looking Godzilla suit ever committed to celluloid. For those reasons and more, three Wops have been bestowed upon it, and it comes highly recommended to kaiju fans everywhere. As we watch the radioactive beast once again lumber off into the ocean on his lonely journey home, and little high pitched Japanese kids in vasectomy shorts wave him on, we ponder his triumphantly destructive return one day and smile.


Of all the buildings he could eat, Godzilla foolishly picked a Sriracha sauce factory.

B.W.'s Top Ten Godzilla Suits (and his five least favorite)

With thirty daikaiju movies to his name at the time of this writing, Godzilla, as originally created by suitmation/miniatures wiz Eiji Tsubaraya, is the most popular of Toho Studios giant cinematic monsters, by far. The fact that each movie's respective Godzilla suit was built from scratch results in thirty different, varying looks for everyone's favorite radioactive bully/hero. Some are cooler than Bueller, others Tonight, we'll bypass the usual movie reviews and continue our Kai-June celebration with a list of my ten favorite on screen incarnations of Big G. Roll 'em!


10) 2002 Kiryu-Goji as seen in: Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla, Godzilla Tokyo S.O.S.
A variation on the Mire-Goji design from Godzilla 2000 and Godzilla vs Megaguirus with a more Heisei-slanted head and different skin base color and spikes, you can't deny Kiryu-Goji's wicked look. Next, we've got...


9) 1971 Shoshingeki-Goji as seen in: Godzilla vs. The Smog Monster
With his sludge-burned eye and hands, this mouth-wiping variant was the first one I saw at the drive-in in my old man's '67 Chevy Impala as an evil little brat. Though his cartoonish look is seemingly geared more towards younger fans, it works for this guy.


8) 1964 Mosu-Goji as seen in: Mothra vs Godzilla
Eyebrow-Goji, or Fuad-Goji as he's known in obscure circles of one that consist of me (bang, bang), is a decent looking suit, kept from the top of my list by the tragic side note that this particular Big G famously gets punked the fuck out in the end by a pair of silk-slinging caterpillars. WTF,  Eyebrows.


7) 1954 Shodai-Goji as seen in: Godzilla (1954)
The one that started it all. Love those dead-looking eyes, and fully appreciate that he's not out to be a hero to any loudmouthed children. His one aim: Chew on train cars and destroy everything immediately, avoiding any oxygen destroyers in his legendary path. Very iconic and cool.


6) 1975 Megaro-Goji as seen in: Godzilla vs Megalon
Here's another Godzilla I cut my teeth on, a playful variant on the Shoshingeki-Goji suit that had been featured as far back as 1968's Destroy All Monsters, slightly altered, though with his familiar unhappy scowl, and goofy mannerisms, i.e. shaking hands with Jet Jaguar. Why would he shake hands with that metallic mook? He was supposed to aid Godzilla, and ended up getting mopped up but good in mere moments by Megalon and Gigan, ultimately needing a bail out from Big G himself.
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5) 1993 Rado-Goji as seen in: Godzilla vs Mechagodzilla
Any of the Heisei-era suits would have fit the bill here, as they all share a pretty similar look  It's this Godzilla that reignited my flame of interest in kaiju movies that had laid mostly dormant since the late seventies, Godzilla 1985 included, as you'll soon see. Next there's...


4) 1995 Desu-Goji as seen in: Godzilla vs. Destoroyah
Check out Burning Godzilla in the pic above. I rest my case.


3) 2001 Sokogeki-Goji  as seen in: GMK: Giant Monsters All Out Attack!
Deliciously evil looking, this demonic incarnation will expel a mushroom cloud-inducing breath ray with his soulless white eyes and nifty pot belly. Tits, for sure, from the guy who resurrected Gamera in the nineties.


2) 1962 King-Goji  as seen in: King Kong vs Godzilla
This stocky rascal is my favorite Showa era suit, famous for his cinematic scrap with King Kong, or at least the cheesy Japanese suitmation version of the American giant. That particular fight was fixed, btw. No way Godzilla loses to a special ed-looking ape suit, no fucking way.


1) 2000 Mire-Goji as seen in: Godzilla 2000
Ah, my favorite, Millennium Godzilla. The drastic renovation of the classic Big G design was a grand slam, in my book.

and just for the hell of it, here are my five least favorite Godzilla suits/incarnations:


5) 1985 84-Goji  as seen in : Godzilla 1985
84-Goji's smallish egg head and vampire fangs have the same effect on me that misogyny has on the ears of a hair triggered SJW. I didn't like the design when the trailers for the movie turned up at the theaters or on television, I didn't like it the first time I sat through it, and I probably don't like it any more today.


4) 1967 Mosuko-Goji as seen in : Son of Godzilla
Mosuko-Goji might be the ugliest, most embarrassingly designed suit to date. It's fitting then, that it's paired up with that smoke ring-blowing gimp of a son, Minya/Minilla in this movie for one of the crappiest, least engaging adventures to date.


3) 1955 Gyakushu-Goji as seen in: Godzilla Raids Again/ Gigantis the Fire Monster
The formula that was so effective the previous year in the pioneer film seems to have been tossed out the fucking window for this second one. Less Godzilla than Jim Varney. I could spend all day whipping up witticisms for how rotten this suit looks, surely the worst of the lot, but I'd rather turn attention towards the top/bottom two, which, to nobody's surprise, are...


2) 2014 Legendary Goji as seen in : Godzilla (2014)
As shitty as the '55 and '67 suits are, at least they're actual fucking suits. Here's a fat, handicapped-looking dog-esque design fleshed out on computers for a whopping seven minutes of screen time. Admittedly popular with some, but some people will like whatever phoned in garbage you throw at them. Make no mistake, Hollywood cheapens that which it sinks its evil talons into, no doubt. Fail.


1) 1998 Zilla as seen in: Godzilla (1998)
Where did you think Roland Emmerich's dud of a computer generated iguana would fall on my lists? I've yet to sit all the way through this mutt, and I have no plans to do so any time soon. Thanks for removing the "God" in Godzilla, Hollywood. My father, legendary for blurting out "Look how fucking fake that is! Fake, stupid shit!" whenever he spots Godzilla on television like a film critic with Tourette's, actually liked this movie. That should tell you all you need to know. Epic fail.

...so there you have it. What are your favorites? Least favorites? Let me know in the comment section, drop me an e-mail, or post your own entry and send me a link to it. I'd love to hear from you.

"Destroy All Monsters" (1968) d/ Ishiro Honda

Growing up in the seventies, seeing tonight's review listed in the TV Guide for the coming week usually led to prolonged bouts of unbridled kid giddiness, if not lengthy negotiations with the M & P to stay up late and watch, if it was on after that grey, fuzzy area known in my house as "bedtime". After all, this wasn't just Godzilla and Mothra, or a couple of Gargantuas, this was ALL MONSTER territory. Besides the usual culprits: Godzilla, Mothra, Rodan, and the three-headed King, you were getting Gorosaurus, Kumonga (Spiga here), Manda, Angillas, Minya, Baragon, and even Varan the Unbelievable shows up for a brief pair of shots. That's unbelievable. Read on...


Remember when astronauts wore this lemony get up, way back in 1999?
In the distant future of 1999, the United Nations Science Committee has somehow managed to rustle up all of the earth's giant monsters and supplant them on an impossibly tiny island they've christened "Monster Land". They're all there despite long shots that make the place look cramped for even two guys-in-suits. Everything is controlled from a subterranean base on the island, until it isn't. On the human front, you've got Dr. Yoshido (Jun Tazaki) dispatching his sixties-tastic Moonlight SY-3 rocket spacecraft and crew to investigate the sudden loss of communications with ahem, Monster Land. Wouldn't you know it, the researchers stationed there have been slipped a gaseous mickey and rendered subservient to a race of pushy alien women in silver lame capes n' hoods known as the Kilaaks. All the monsters are sent out on a worldwide rampage by the interstellar bitches, with Godzilla stomping the Big Apple, Gorosaurus burrowing up into Paris (Why does Gorosaurus burrow anyway? Strikes me as a poor man's T-Rex.), Rodan flaps through Moscow, Mothra headbutting oncoming trains in Beijing, and Manda flopping around limply in London, respectively. We foolish earthlings are indeed in for it now.


"I removed the transmitter from behind your ear. I may also have elbow-titted you in the melee. Sorry."
While the world deals with its sudden monster infestation, the Kilaaks are building a stronghold under Mt. Fuji. The UNSC manages to uncover the extraterrestrial (While we're at it, why do the alien races all look like Japanese in these movies. Just a thought, I'm not complaining about hot Japanese cooze in go-go outfits, trust me...) plot, and most of the trainsmitters they've supplanted in rocks...coconuts. Basketballs. Yeah. Anyway, with control of the daikaiju transferred back to the good guys, the Kilaaks send for their three-headed trump card in the form of King Ghidorah, who squares off against the whole damned lot of them. Ghidorah manages to bully Angillas some, before ultimately getting punked the fuck out by an Angillas neckbite, Gorosaurus jumpkick (Why didn't he break out this stuff against King Kong two years earlier?), and Godzilla roughhousing, topped off with a silk casket woven by Kumonga and Mothra in unison. Godzilla stomps one head into the dirt, and as a final slap in the face, Minya smoke rings the last conscious head into defeat. The Kilaak's final hope lies in a mysterious Fire Dragon, which turns out to be little more than a flame-engulfed flying saucer, and that, too, is pulverized. Hooray for Earth. Wave goodbye to the monsters, cramped once again on their archipelago.


"Spare us your lightning, you're about to get clowned, bitch."
I don't wanna sound too much like the kid who grew up into Mr.Elitist Prick, but overall, if you're not into Godzilla, King Ghidorah, Mothra larva, Rodan, Manda, Angillas, or Gorosaurus, there's not nearly as much daikaiju as advertised, hardly enough to merit "All" in the title. And though Godzilla, Gorosaurus, and King Ghidorah are all cool as fuck, nobody's settling in,  in front of the big screen, jonesing to cheer on a flimsy-looking Manda puppet or the perpetually piss-weak Angillas. Not even a gaggle of ironic kaiju hipsters in fedoras. I'm doubting Mothra larva's fan base as this juncture, too. Still, gonna lay two Wops upon it, in any case. Worth a look, for hardcore daikaiju freaks.


As a Vikings fan, Godzilla did a lot less of this, especially in playoff games last season. Oof-ah!

"Ghidorah the Three Headed Monster" (1964) d/ Ishiro Honda

What we've got on our hands tonight, folks, is tantamount to Toho's first big cinematic daikaiju Wrestlemania ticket, featuring the three biggest monsters to date, and introducing a brand spanking new one that would endure the ages while endearing kaiju fans the world over. Of course, I speak of none other than King Ghidorah, whose eight movie appearances span the Showa era, the Heisei era, and the Millenium era, in various incarnations. There's been a cretaceous variation, a Keizer version, a Death Ghidorah on all fours, and even a partially robotic incarnation, with just as many roles and backstories to mention, though here, in his first movie, it should be noted that he's the familiar gold scaled, dual-tailed, lightning breathing, three headed destroyer of planets that we've come to know and love, as Godzilla's baddest interstellar nemesis.


"Ain't nuthin' in this mountain but us prehistoric chickens!"
After Princess Selina Salno of Selgina (Akiko Wakabayashi)...phew, that's some serious alliteration right there... disappears mysteriously moments before the plane she's aboard suddenly explodes in mid-air, Det Shindo (Yosuke Natsuki), who's assigned to protect her on her visit to Japan, can only assume he's failed in carrying out his orders. Elsewhere, Professor Murai (Hiroshi Koizumi) investigates an equally mysterious meteor shower that has deposited an enormous meteorite in the nearby forest, one that displays great magnetism from time to time. Meanwhile, Selina turns up unharmed in Japan, in plain clothes, and claiming to be Venusian, to boot, while spouting familiar prophesies of impending doom. The miniature Shobijin (The Peanuts) also happen to be in Japan, on vacation from Easter Island for a television appearance, where they sing to Mothra back home, to the glee of probably nobody that isn't five years old and wearing vasectomy shorts. Before Selina's corrupt uncle, who tried offing his niece in the first place, can send hit men from Selgina to finish the job, Godzilla and Rodan both make the scene, and their colossal scrap means death and destruction, as always. Cue: Stock footage of fleeing Japanese.


This would've made a great 7th grade math book cover drawing or a back patch for a denim vest.
After Selina foregoes a psychiatric evaluation where the doctor's sole, reasonable prognosis is that she is, indeed, possessed by a Venusian consciousness, she relates the horrible extinction of her people at the electrical gravity beams of a terrible three-headed monster named Ghidorah, and further prophesies his arrival for more of the same right here on Earth! At this point, Murai's meteorite proves to be an egg, instead, and one from which King Ghidorah emerges. Before too much of civilization is wiped out, the Shobijin enlist Mothra, in larval form, to convince Godzilla and Rodan to stop their monstrous bickering long enough to save the planet from the invading dragon. Cue: subtitled monster convo, ready your diapers. Mothra shrugs off the unreasonable, unreachable behemoths, and takes on Ghidorah itself, not the brightest of ideas the heroic caterpillar has ever come up with. The larva's bravery (Am I actually writing this? Wow.) inspires Godzilla and Rodan to join the brawl, and what follows, must be considered an epic daikaiju battle for Showa era supremacy, and one you'll want to experience for yourselves.


"Easy for you to say, you sprayed me with silk until I fell into the sea!", grumbles Godzilla (Haruo Nakajima).
We last saw Hiroshi Koizumi in 1963's Matango, but his next Godzilla appearance would come in 1974's Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla. Akiko Wakabayashi would graduate from Toho-born kaiju films to You Only Live Twice three years later as a Bond girl. The fifth film in the Showa Godzilla series, the second of 1964, following Mothra vs Godzilla aka/Godzilla vs the Thing, and the first movie where Godzilla has a change of heart, turning heroic from his usual villainous role to this point. The Showa Ghidorah suit seen here would appear four times in Godzilla movies over a nine year period, before turning up for the last time in a mostly pulverized state in a pair of Jun Fukuda-directed Zone Fighter episodes in 1973. There's enough giant monster suit-age here to satisfy most kaiju fans, and ample silliness to cap off multiple viewings of this cult classic. Therefore, two respectable Wops, it must be. Check it out.


"I'm giving out free...GRAVITY BEAMS! Ha-ha, take that!"

"Invasion of Astro Monster" (1965) d/ Ishiro Honda

Man, this one was a Saturday afternoon staple of mine growing up, seemingly always on television, much to the dismay of my old man, who never passed up the opportunity to point out how fake the suitmation effects were from the comfort of the living room couch, and/or how stupid the movies were because of said special effects, though he could never be bothered to get up and change the channel, despite his feigned disgust. That's right, woprophiles, in the mid-70s, there were no remote controls to speak of, and if you wanted to change the channel (to one of the other seven or eight available) you had to get up off your lazy ass and twist a massive channel knob on the front of the set to do it. Anyway, tonight's review marks the sixth Godzilla film in the Showa series, and the first Japanese/American co-production of a such a movie.


"No, I don't want to drive to West Nanticoke for promazine and pierogies, Adams..."
Fuji and Glenn (Akira Takarada, Nick Adams) are sent on an interstellar mission to the mysterious Planet X, where they're taken into an underground base by the leather-clad Xilien race, as led by the hand gesturing Controller (Yoshio Tsuchiya), who points out that his people have been fearfully forced to move their operations under the planet's surface to avoid the regular lightning attacks of Monster Zero, instantly recognized by the astronauts as the fearsome King Ghidorah, who'd wreaked havoc on Earth once before. In return for a cure for cancer (or any disease you can think of, according to the English dub), the Controller requests the use of two of Earth's monsters, Godzilla and Rodan, to combat their flying three-headed pest on Planet X, sending the men back to their own planet with his proposition. Also, there's an inventor named Tetsuo (not to be confused with the Iron Man) who's romantically linked to Fuji's sister, who's kidnapped by Xilien spies after getting scammed out of a deafening siren he's whipped up.


Q: Are we not men? A: No! We are Xiliens.
Our space travelling heroes begin to suspect things are not what they appear after three Xilien spacecrafts make the scene on Earth to transport Godzilla and Rodan, both in hibernation, back to Planet X in massive energy bubbles. Fuji, Glenn, and a scientist named Sakurai accompany the monsters on their trip, and it isn't long before the astronauts encounter multiple lookalikes of the businesswoman (Kumi Mizuno) who shafted Tetsuo out of his invention among the Xilien ranks. The controller sends the men back to Earth with a tape containing the miracle cure instructions after Godzilla and Rodan successfully drive away King Ghidorah on the surface of X, but when the tape is played for world leaders, it sounds nothing like a formula for drugs and everything like an ultimatum to the people of Earth to surrender their planet to the Xiliens else they will face the combined force of Godzilla, Rodan, and King Ghidorah, who's been controlled by the alien race the whole time. Should have used PayPal to avoid a transaction dispute, I'd imagine.


- 1 Wop :Still not the most preposterous thing Godzilla's ever done on camera, but damned close.
Tonight's movie, which comprised half of a great double bill in 1970, under the alternate "Monster Zero" title and paired with War of the Gargantuas (1966),  stands as one of two Toho films that Nanticoke, Pa. native, Nick Adams, would appear in, also co-starring with Boris Karloff in the British production of Die Monster Die! (1965), before an accidental overdose claimed the actor's life in 1968. You can visit his grave in Berwick. Akira Takarada had appeared in the original Godzilla (1954), Mothra vs Godzilla (1964), Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster (1966), and King Kong Escapes (1966), before returning triumphantly to daikaiju films in 1992's Godzilla vs Mothra reboot and 2004's Godzilla: Final Wars. I'm not a huge fan of any of the monster suits they used here, with a middling Godzilla, the clumpy-looking toupees of Showa King Ghidorah, and my least favorite Rodan, looking like he rides the kaiju short bus, to date. At least Godzilla doesn't have his '64 eyebrows, I suppose. Opinions are funny like that. Still, there's enough entertainment here to warrant a pair of Wops overall. Check it out for yourselves.


It's like thunder, lightning, the way I love Ghidorah is frightening. He'd need arms to knock on wood, though.

"Matango" (1963) d/ Ishiro Honda

We've got some Japanese fungi on the menu tonight, courtesy of the folks at Toho, as directed by Ishiro Honda, who helmed all the biggest Godzilla titles over the course of his career for the studio, and starring Akira Kubo, who you'll remember from decades-spanning genre staples like Destroy All Monsters (1968) and Gamera: Defender of the Universe (1995). Also on board is Kumi Mizuno, an actress famous for roles in cult favorites like Invasion of the Astro Monster (1965), War of the Gargantuas (1966), and most recently, Godzilla: Final Wars (2004). If you're expecting giant radioactive lizards squashing fleeing citizens and blowing toes up destruction rays in tonight's entry, you're bound to be disappointed, as the threat is human-sized this time around, though probably doubly weird and infinitely more ambient than most films of that nature, securing its status as an authentic cult classic of horror/sci-fi, to be sure.


"On a clear day, you really can see the edge of the rear projection screen."
At the outset, we're met by an asylum denizen as he graciously relates his lunacy-packed backstory to the audience, maintaining his own sanity throughout, or so he says...After a mercilous storm (getting pelted in the mush by off-screen buckets of water, you know the type) interrupts a carefree day trip on a yacht full of Japanese personalities, including, but not limited to the celebrity yacht owner Kasai (Yoshio Tsuchiya), the singer Mami (Kumi Mizuno), Naoyuki the skipper (Hiroshi Koizumi), the millionaire and his wife, the professor aaaand...Mary Aaaaaann... Yeah, you get the picture. After all of that, and days adrift at sea with a somber radio broadcast assuring there'd be no rescue parties to mention, they land upon a deserted Gilligan's Island, if by "Gilligan", you mean a thick green fungus wallpapering every thing in sight, and huge mushrooms that nobody'd better eat on account of possible toxicity. You know, I bet you somebody's gonna eat some of those later on, and cause irreparable damage, death, and destruction to all castaways involved, you just wait and see...


"When we agreed to be Jets, we were Jets all the way from our first cigarette to our last dying day."
After much fruitless hunting and collecting, a search party stumbles across a shipwreck steeped in the aforementioned fungi and surrounded by a wooded area permeated with huge spores, as well as ponds full of collected rainwater, leading our survivors to speculate the area had been used for secretive nuclear testing at some point in the past. Much treachery ensues between them, as a black market for turtle eggs and birds develops(I'd eat a turtle egg, you kiddin' me?), and such luxury items are much too difficult to procure for yourself if you're, say, suntanning all day instead of digging for paltry potatoes and grabbing puny seaweed snacks like the shipwrecked plebeians are forced to exhaustively do. Naturally, Kasai is far and away the most entitled shitface of the bunch, often going on late night raids into the party's rationed food supplies, and it isn't long before...surprise, certain of our heroes, decide to veto the usual potato and seaweed diet, in favor of some of those big, beautiful mushrooms that surround them. Cue: death fungus mushroom people. Score a copy for yourselves and see how it all winds up.


"Alriiiiiiight! Ze WAAAAANGGGGO MATAAAAAANGO! One! Two! Three! Four!!"
Honda helmed nearly sixty films in his career, with titles like Godzilla (1954), Mothra (1961), King Kong vs. Godzilla (1962), Frankenstein Conquers the World (1965), and Destroy All Monsters (1968) to his credit. Special effects were provided by none other than Eiji Tsubaraya, the man responsible for the suitmation technique (man in a rubber suit interacting on a set full of miniatures with the action slowed down slightly to add size to the proceedings) still popular in Japanese film culture today. Tonight's review is an admittedly very groovy and stylized in delivering a nightmarish undercurrent, originally weakened by bad dubbing and a silly re-title for American audiences and later resurrected for the home video crowd in a special remastered, restored edition on dvd (the one I screened for this review, cost me all of five bucks in a used bin at f.y.e.). Matango is just weirdly effective enough in it's bleak outlook to keep your attention throughout it's brisk eighty-nine minute running time. A respectable Two Wops should suffice here. Check it out.


"I picked you an ounce of these macro caps, breh! Let's party!" 

Angillas, there's something funny going on around here...

              We're kicking off a month of reviews of films that take the path less trampled, of course, I'm talking about the realm of the Japanese Kaiju movie, of which there happen to be several sub-genres to choose from, like kaiju eiga, kaijin, and daikaiju, translated roughly as monster movies, humanoid monsters, and giant monsters, respectively. I set out to focus on the latter, most recognizable category of giant monsters, as handled by studios like Toho and Daiei with their long running Godzilla and Gamera franchises, though I'm not ruling out any movies that fall solely into the former two categories. Why pigeonhole yerself, sez I. Regardless,  eager woprophiles can expect to see lots of intricate miniatures being tail-swiped and stomped over in slow motion by Japanese gents in rubber suits, stock footage of panicked citizens evacuating cities, ineffective military units being melted by hateful kaiju death-breath, self-aware Ultra-esque robots tag teaming with giant radioactive lizards to square off against giant beetles and space bird-cyborgs with belly buttons like a table saw, and much more all June long.

              My love for such movies dates back to the Little Wop days of yesteryear, when it wasn't uncommon for my old man to pile us into his '67 Chevy Impala on the weekend and drive us to one of the plethora of  area drive-in theaters that once proliferated this valley in the early to mid-1970s, for a drive-in double bill of destruction that usually featured a Godzilla movie or one of the Sinbad series that featured the legendary stop motion animation creature effects of wizard Ray Harryhausen. As you could imagine, I wouldn't trade my memories growing up for a canister of G-cells or the keys to my own Maser tank. Anyway, we haven't covered too many of these movies to date, so we've got a long list to choose from this month. I think we'll kick off the festivities with a little Daiei number you might find interesting. Remember, Jet Jaguar always has right of way.  Let's make it!


A retro- Kaiju (14) eye view from the top of Big Wop. You ants... look just like ants down there. Skreeeeeooonkk!!!